Re:Maybe You Don’t Need to Talk to Someone
by roenxi on Friday March 17, 2023 @04:23PM
(#35202394)
> In my youth it was common for people to say to me "You need to vent before things blow up, get a punching bag or something."
This advice is very questionable, it subtly assumes that you are causing your own problems. It sounds really obvious, but if you have an actual problem neither venting nor punching go any way towards making the situation better. Venting is only a legitimate strategy to me when it makes you feel really good. Otherwise it is more or less useless.
A better approach is identify the problem -> test if the identification was correct -> have a good faith go at some alternative theories anyway just in case cognitive biases are in play and you can shake them -> attempt to resolve the problem. Talking to someone in the 3rd step, if you trust their judgement, is valuable.
This advice is very questionable, it subtly assumes that you are causing your own problems. It sounds really obvious, but if you have an actual problem neither venting nor punching go any way towards making the situation better. Venting is only a legitimate strategy to me when it makes you feel really good. Otherwise it is more or less useless.
A better approach is identify the problem -> test if the identification was correct -> have a good faith go at some alternative theories anyway just in case cognitive biases are in play and you can shake them -> attempt to resolve the problem. Talking to someone in the 3rd step, if you trust their judgement, is valuable.