Buying anything outside the Dell or Lenovo business ecosystem really puts your head on the chopping block to be announced a crazy person the minute some business critical function (like dual monitors through dock) doesn’t work…

You need to find a better company with a better corporate culture.

Those are in much shorter supply than you seem to imply.

I've never previously encountered one so perverse that choice of laptop is basically tantamount to a fashion choice and causes ridicule.

Because normally you buy from Lenovo, HP or Dell for the warranty, support and driverpacks for SCCM etc.

Real companies have IT provision laptops for employees.

If you are consultant remote, sure just Citrix into the envroment. But if your laptop breaks its on you.

Several people on HN lauded Lenovos' same-day-service warranty. Downtime costs a lot of money.