The irony would be that the top performers would get and want the puffer positions, while the “suckers” did the work.

Hiring managers: Don't fall for the parent's game. Their leetcode skills prove that they are just trying to trick you into hiring them, after which they will become a valuable member of your team, making your next firing more difficult. If you really want a puffer person, hire me. I'll take the position with no interview, demonstrating my commitment to putting zero effort into your project.

Edit: And don't worry about any bidding war with other managers. I'll just put you in my queue and rotate through you all as needed.