I hear you. I took many electronics classes over the years and never seemed to be able to build much intuition. I've often joked that 80% of my engineering training came from YouTube, and it seems to line up.

I found Ben Eater's 8-bit breadboard computer project incredibly helpful in grokking both low-level computers and the electronic theory. https://eater.net/

I also highly recommend the channels bigclive, ave, eebvlog, Louis Rossman, and electroboom.

For podcasts, I've found The Amp Hour and Embedded.fm to be invaluable. There's also Contextual Electronics if you want a more Udemy-style experience.

As a fun toy, I recently picked up Upperstory's Spintronics (https://upperstory.com/spintronics/), which provides an excellent way to grok oscillators and transistors mechanically. You might do well to start there.

The best training I got, though, was sitting next to an EE as he troubleshot hos own designs. Anything you can do to get that experience - meetups, conferences, HAM events, etc. is absolute gold.

Best of luck in your adventures pushing electrons around!