The one thing agile is aimed in the right direction about is that software is for users. Users use it to create value in a business context. Many developers are too far removed from value creation and making sure their features and design changes will actually benefit users in the long run. Tech debt is a thing, but so is business value driven development that works well for users. All of these refactoring side treks need to really be necessary. I do greatly empathize with grandparent, lack of being seen and acknowledged really sucks. And who knows what their situation really was like.