That's... no, I think that's just objectively wrong. Have you actually used all these systems? Display latency in the device-remote schemes is really pretty awful, where the Tesla screen scrolls like butter. Obviously no one is an expert on all these things, but I watch friends' vehicles and the occasional rental, and it's really not close.

I went quickly to youtube to check, and pulled up this comparatively recent Mach-E video showing carplay. It's... janky and clumsy. Buttons take 300ms+ to actuate. See the sequence starting around 3:15. No wonder it feels unsafe: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ongr-sptxto

Now watch this one, which is actually two years old (not showing the current UI, and running on what is now one-generation-old MCU hardware):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KGKOWyFzDBs

There are likely better examples, these are just ones that popped up first for me. But yeah, that's the state of in-car navigation UIs. And Tesla is absolutely the best.

Perhaps they are on wifi or Bluetooth? My civic 2016 with CarPlay plugged in is absolutely perfect and not slower than interacting with my phone.

You touch on one of the key problems here. "Not showing the current UI". Allowing cars to follow the same ui refresh cycle as cell phones undermines the predictability of operating the vehicle.

There has to be a balance between the "always new" and "never updated" approaches here.

I'd say a car's core ui, everything from how to wipers work, to brake pedal sensitivity(changed in a few tesla updates?!), should require a manual update, a discussion with a car tech, and a sign off by the customer.

None of this stuff should ever, ever change in an update, without blaring, in your face, clear walkthroughs on the change.

And none of them should be forced, or preclude other updates. EG, by no means, should the control system of a car you paid tens of thousands for, suddenly change post sale.

Consumers first, safety first, cost savings and "cool factor" complete last.