> I've seen some of this in our local schools: meetings held with the head teacher to "hear both sides" when one side is a bully asserting their right to bully the other side.

This is endemic in modern culture. The need to treat two opposing opinions as equally valid and balance them against each other as if there's some sane middle-ground to be found. There's no middle-ground between slavery and non-slavery. Or between the earth is flat and science.

Yes 100%, there's a reason for this. Distinguishing right from wrong is an absolute act, and we have been conditioned to associate that with religious zealotry or raving lunacy. By hearing both sides, people are shying away from taking responsibility. Also, by holding up an ethos (e.g. bullying is categorically wrong) to others, we hold up a mirror to ourselves. Hypocrisy is instantly revealed then. (Note for example that the religious right has no problem being hypocrites ).

> They're in college now and so I guess it wasn't necessary.

Just saying man if you are looking for a Christmas present for them get them a membership to train at a BJJ gym, if you have a daughter it will keep her safe, if you have a son it will give him the opportunity to interact and build relationships with people he doesn't know, and may not normally associate with. BJJ is all about technique over physicality and carries a low risk of injury.

For both of them it will give them the confidence that if they end up in a bad situation they know they have the skills to respond calmly. In addition if the gym is any good they'll have them do some rolling so they'll be able to learn to stay calm under pressure, which is a very transferable skill.

Just a suggestion.