When I was walking under a cloud, it really helped year-to-year to pay someone to listen and talk through my thoughts and feelings.

I'm not under a cloud.

I have paid for therapy for 20 years.

the world is filled to the top with people who lie, cheat, and steal, because those things are easier than working, waiting, and being nice.

the earth is a hellscape full of people waiting to feed on everything you have.

Ah, I see. Well, I hope you find peace and pleasure in your solitude.

Thanks for sharing, human history is indeed littered with brutal events and these things build further hate for future generations, if they choose not to let go of the past.

Despite that, the world and the universe has almost unlimited beauty, but it is ultimately up to an individual person to find and see it.

Sounds like you're in a dark place. I hope things improve.

When in doubt, read some Tolstoy:

https://en.m.wikisource.org/wiki/Twenty-three_Tales/Two_Old_...

This is pretty relatable. Not sure I'd say "unworthy", as that's hard to measure. Instead, I'd just say that consciousness seems to lead directly and inevitably to misery. And following Qohelet from thousands of years ago, those who are no longer conscious, or never were, are the best off.

We'll all be dead quite soon. In the meantime, I enjoy going out into nature a bit (waterfalls are great), and more reliably, having a pet. I think this is the best that this world has to offer. Godspeed.