You mention OkCupid by name, and for the longest time they let you pick in the 'Languages' field C++. I used to use that as shorthand for programmer. Saw a handful of people use it here and there.

Also it's not like they deleted your profile if you mentioned being a programmer in any of the open text boxes. I've spotted several people that mentioned that in their profiles, and I was looking at women exclusively, so I didn't see it as often, but I did see it.

This was quite a few years ago though. Might be different now.