Perhaps something like the OpenAI approach to their GPT-3 deal with Microsoft is better. That is, if the work Microsoft do with GPT-3 goes in a direction OpenAI doesn't like, OpenAI reserves the right to veto the work [1].
[1]: https://www.ted.com/talks/the_ted_interview_the_race_to_buil...
It's not an easy question. However, as the creator of the software I guess I feel that my opinion should count in how it's used. As a simplistic example, if in some dystopian timeline my OSS were used to facilitate a holocaust I'd like to be able to do something to halt that. It doesn't matter that the perpetrators feel that what they're doing is right.
The Slaughterbots campaign argued, rightly, I think, that advanced autonomous lethal weapons should be suppressed because they enable unethical uses and unscrupulous actors far more than legitimate defense.
It can't really be seen in isolation from the environment (social, economical, etc) it's going to come into I suppose, but in the real, concrete world we have creating them is not a neutral act, and some of the consequences are reasonably predictable.