Please don't be spooky

Re:Please don't be spooky by vidarh on Friday September 16, 2022 @04:51AM (#32863783)

The thing is, this is easy to say without context. But often there is all kinds of surrounding context that may or may not give cause for anxiety. E.g. a "can we talk?" right after a major project you led failed is far more likely to cause anxiety than the very same "can we talk?" right after a major success. But a lot of the time you as a manager will not even be aware of the context. E.g. all kinds of rumours might be circulating that you've not heard of, and given a staff member cause to be worried, or said staff member might think you're unhappy about something you've not even thought about.

If you don't give context, chances are they'll fill in their own.

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Re:Please don't be spooky by carlmr on Friday September 16, 2022 @08:34AM (#32865272)

>If you don't give context, chances are they'll fill in their own.

The lack of context is a general problem for communication. If you don't give sufficient context, you might cause anxiety, like in this case, but this is not the only problem. If you lack context your message will often not be understood.

E.g. I was asked if I remember Nick. I didn't know who Nick was, there are many Nicks in the world. I might be bad with names in any case. Then I inquired about some context, I was told it's Anna's friend. I don't know who Anna is either, also a very common name. After a bit of back and forth I find out it's a guy I talked to at a wedding last month. There were hundreds of new names for me. Names I would probably not remember. But if you start with "do you remember Nick, the guy at the wedding we talked to about X", I might stand a chance.

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Re:Please don't be spooky by JohnFen on Friday September 16, 2022 @08:04AM (#32864959)

> If you don't give context, chances are they'll fill in their own.

100% this.

Not just in the workplace, but in all human interaction. If people don't know what's happening, they'll fill in the blanks on their own -- and usually they'll fill them in with a worst-case scenario.

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Re:Please don't be spooky by vidarh on Friday September 16, 2022 @10:36AM (#32866580)

It can end badly even if they fill in the best case scenario. E.g. consider that hypothetical "can we talk?" after a massively successful project, and someone walking into the office having spent however long fantasising about spending a bonus that only existed in their head because the communication left room for it.

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