> My town was the poorest in my state, so I went to the best possible college elsewhere, and have since lived in other places for work.

Same for me, i grew up in rural south Italy.

> At least I still have group chats with the real friends I made from going to new places and doing new things.

That’s a nice thing you got there, I’m glad for you.

But we’re talking town level community here and not, again, internet forums and online chat rooms (slack/discord/whatever).

At a town level, communities form over decades and over shared struggles (mostly).