What you missed from my original post is that it is a lot of effort to expose transitory state: nobody is going the extra mile to annoy you, they are just not investing in implementing extra UI to expose it.
And in most cases, it's the right balance.
From my experience, most places don't model the transition state. Such that it easily gets bunged.
If you just want to make it hidden, that is fine. But can lead to it's own problems. Usually when you have uniqueness constraints on things.
I don't necessarily care on a progress bar, as those typically have their own woes.
And don't get me wrong, there are easy deletion cases that I am ok with appearing to happen immediately. I just find hiding processes from me is usually more annoying than it is worth. Worse, when the implementation didn't do it as a process, and now they typically just have more edge cases that won't delete cleanly.