Again: these are engineering details, not people; they aren't "arrogant". There is lesser engineering and there is better engineering. As someone who does quite a bit of work with iptables and who has used ACL systems like Tailscale's, I can tell you right off the bat that Tailscale's system is better, and if you have the option of using one or the other --- there are good reasons you might not be able to --- you should use something like Tailscale's, which is identity-aware, testable, dynamic, and simple. Obviously, if you're not using Tailscale at all, this is a moot point, for many reasons, including the fact that if you're not using Tailscale, you don't have to think about how it interacts with your iptables rules.

I'm not making a value judgement about people who need to keep using iptables. I might be making a value judgement about people who demand that everyone else keep using iptables.