Hmmm, in my mind empathy isn't just cognitively understanding that somebody is feeling pain, it's feeling that pain on their behalf. Most people have that ability to some degree, but it's extremely magnified in certain individuals.

Yeah I tend to separate empathy (being able to put yourself in another's shoes and feel what they're feeling) and "other-oriented-ness". Having empathy means you understand what the driver behind you at the fast food restaurant is feeling emotionally if you take too long at the window. Being other-oriented is feeling stressed and wanting to move forward before you've completely checked your order, because you don't want the driver behind you to feel upset by your taking too long.

That's an interesting way to look at it. And a very good example, because that drive through scenario is literally the type of thing I feel almost constantly. I laughed out loud when I read it, because it perfectly describes how I react to almost everything in life that involves other people.