Thanks, I've felt the same thing.
I've even seen therapists who claimed that I could completely 'heal'. But that's a perfectionist attitude itself, which had me banging my head against the wall for too long.
I think the truth is far closer to 'able to live a satisfying life in spite of'
Re:Unlearning perfectionism
by InfinityByTen on Sunday February 06, 2022 @02:50AM
(#30230362)
"Resolution" of trauma is generally nothing but an imaginary "perfect" state. It doesn't exist and usually chasing that is another form of the same dynamic rather a departure from it.
Kudos to you for identifying that for yourself and trying to distance from it!
Re:Unlearning perfectionism
by 0xbadcafebee on Saturday February 05, 2022 @07:10PM
(#30227799)
One could argue that there will never be an accurate term, and thus hating the term for not being completely accurate is perfectionism.
But I could be wrong.... (Says the perfectionist, letting himself off the hook if he is wrong, which he may very well be because he's talking out his ass)
As a person with a lot of unresolved trauma (and perfectionism issues), I hate the term "unresolved trauma". I've been working hard with a therapist and a psychologist for years, and I've made a ton of progress, but my trauma will never be truly resolved. Every few years some new facet of damage will pop up that I won't expect and will have to work through.
It's a never ending process, and (imo) the term unresolved trauma implies that there should be a point where it becomes resolved. That's just not realistic or true for a lot of people.