Everything bad is either the first or if it's REALLY bad then they pull out the second.
It's better to just put up with it a push through than make waves.
YOUR socialization process, you think of it as "dating," doesn't match their socialization process. You conclude they are--insert adjectives--instead of using the opportunity to try to understand the differences, and possibilities, that are being presented to you.
To conclude that Japanese women are submissive, because _you_ don't quite understand the intricacies of Japanese social norms, values, customs, language....
We travel to explore and _expand_ our understanding of the world and the human condition, not to confirm our prejudices. Try it.
No, I didn't conclude all Japanese women are submissive. I met two who embodied the “ideal of the submissive woman,” which creeped me out completely and showed me how awful that is as an actual personality trait. That's literally what I said.
But you're naive if you don't think there is a deeply ingrained culture of perpetuating learned helplessness because of Japan’s highly hierarchical society or Japanese men and women don't hold up submissiveness as a desirable trait in themselves or their partners. It's every bit as widespread as the perfect housewife image from the 1950s used to be in the US.
<I>I met two who embodied the “ideal of the submissive woman,"</I>
... which plays into a stereotype about Asian women, and Japanese women in particular whether you were generalizing or NOT. You conveniently slap a label on 2 girls you met for a few hours and came to ridiculous conclusions because YOU don't understand Japanese culture. Instead of pausing for a second to think about this, you want to double down on a sloppy inaccurate generalization regarding two girls that conveniently fits into the stereotype about ALL Asian women and pat yourself on the shoulder for not getting it, at all, then polish it off by suggesting I'M the naive one.
LMAO
Have at it. Byyyyyeeeeeeeeeeee
Japan is far from the only country that extolls the virtues of submissiveness. But this was my first time experiencing the implications of that in person and it creeped me out.
It very nearly soured me on Japan serval times as you mention it has you.
Many, not just questionable, but outright disturbing practices make it a very bipolar place to live.
The most vivid thing I personally experienced was going clubbing in Osaka then after closing running into a pair of girls I was dancing with at some point and I asked why they weren’t interested and the reply was that I wasn’t (physically) aggressive enough and asked too many questions. They literally didn’t want me to let them say no, so they wouldn’t have to take “responsibility” of going with me.
That night _really_ turned me off of submissiveness as being an attractive personality trait