I had that discussion with her. She was actually an open lesbian, part of the early gay marriage push in new england. At the time (early 2000s) there were some states with old laws that also made female-on-female rape physically impossible. Canada recently abolished "rape" as a distinct crime, instead placing it on the far end of a sexual assault spectrum. I think this is probably the best way forwards.

That's part of the solution, but we also need to challenge societal gender biases that assume men can't be victims. If you look at the CDC stats something like 1/3rd of people victimized in any year are men, but if you look at crimes reported to police it drops to something like 1% of victims being men. It implies men are much less likely to report being raped to the police.

or male-on-male rape

That too, but the CDC stats suggest that female-on-male is more prevalent than male-on-male, although they call female-on-male "made to penetrate" and only call male-on-male "rape" which confuses people into thinking the opposite.