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Re:Ask HN: My boss doesn't think I'm doing good work, how to... by rendall on Thursday January 06, 2022 @11:37PM (#29834912)
Cross-cultural programmer here, and I can help.

In Europe, calling in sick when you're not actually, recognizably ill is a pretty serious breach of trust. No cutesy "mental health break" exceptions. That said, you likely have at least 20 days of paid vacation, plus holidays.

In the US, where 10 days paid vacation is the norm and you're often punished in some way for actually taking it, the occasional "mental health break" of calling in sick is winked at.

Re:Ask HN: My boss doesn't think I'm doing good work, how to... by Veen on Friday January 07, 2022 @04:43AM (#29837118)
A company I work with was recently acquired by a US company (I'm British). I was quite confused when, in a meeting, all of the Americans suggested that the company should implement mental health days several times a month. My thought was: isn't that what the weekends and holidays are for? It would be quite unusual for British employees to demand mental health days. Perhaps the lack of paid vacation explains the difference (Although, I haven't had a full week off since 2014 because I'm a freelancer, so maybe they have a point).
Re:Ask HN: My boss doesn't think I'm doing good work, how to... by confidantlake on Friday January 07, 2022 @11:58AM (#29841536)
I can assure you there is nothing "cutesy" about mental health. Feeling severely depressed/suicidal is much more serious than some minor cold. Thank god the US is moving in the direction where mental health is recognized as a serious issue. Comments like this show that we still have a long way to go.
Re:Ask HN: My boss doesn't think I'm doing good work, how to... by rendall on Friday January 07, 2022 @03:15PM (#29844148)
> I can assure you there is nothing "cutesy" about mental health

You misread what I wrote, and then got angry about what you imagined I wrote. Usually I don't explain myself to strangers on the internet, since people who angrily misread also usually angrily double down, but here goes.

In the US, it is frowned upon to take a scheduled day off just to relax, outside of your annual 2 weeks of vacation. So you call in "sick". Since you're not really sick, but want to relax, you call your reason for illness a "mental health day". I characterized this practice as cutesy, because it's a cutsey repurpose of the concept of sick day for self-care. It's not a mental health crisis, it's relaxing. But as long as you characterize it that way, it gets a nod and a wink from anyone who cares.

In Europe, by contrast, if you need time off because work is stressful, you plan ahead, take the day off and be cheerfully honest that you spent the day at the beach or whatever. But if you tell people you were sick, and then spend the day at the beach, people will at best think you are odd, but probably will think you're a liar. Telling people it was a "mental health break" to call in sick in order to go to the beach will not get the same cozy reception it gets in the US.

Clear?

Re:Ask HN: My boss doesn't think I'm doing good work, how to... by confidantlake on Friday January 07, 2022 @04:18PM (#29844962)
Apologize for misreading you and getting frustrated. I appreciate the explanation. I hope you can understand where I am coming from.

If I am anxious or depressed, going outside into nature or to the beach would help me tremendously. Much more so than sitting at home. How anxious and depressed do I have to be before it flips from "relaxing" to "legit"?

At my job I get x vacation days and y sick days. If I feel I unwell mentally I am going to use a sick day. Why is it anyone's business why I am sick or what I did on my sick day?

If my coworker said they were feeling terrible yesterday so they took the day off to go to the beach I would understand and encourage that. I would also admire them being brave enough to admit that rather than pretend they had a virus.

Re:Ask HN: My boss doesn't think I'm doing good work, how to... by unionpivo on Friday January 07, 2022 @04:49PM (#29845304)
You get as many sick day's as you need, but if it longer than 2 (or maybe 3 I forgot) days, you need note from doctor.

> If I am anxious or depressed, going outside into nature or to the beach would help me tremendously.

If you are feeling that semi regularly, you might be on your way to a burnout or actually experiencing one.

Re:Ask HN: My boss doesn't think I'm doing good work, how to... by confidantlake on Friday January 07, 2022 @05:48PM (#29845968)
Oh yeah absolutely feeling that. 2 weeks of vacation for years on end has done that to me. Planning on interviewing and trying to get a start date as far out as I can. (maybe 3 months or even 6 months if they are ok with that).
Re:Ask HN: My boss doesn't think I'm doing good work, how to... by rendall on Friday January 07, 2022 @05:27PM (#29845738)
I agree, confidentlake. You should be able to take time off of work to relax if you need. And, if the only outlet the US culture allows is to call in sick, then there's nothing wrong with doing that!
Re:Ask HN: My boss doesn't think I'm doing good work, how to... by bluehatbrit on Friday January 07, 2022 @06:57AM (#29838057)
Slight tangent, I've been seeing a lot of companies from the US advertising remote roles in the UK and advertising "20 days paid vaccation + public holidays" as one of their "amazing benefits". I often wonder if they realise it's a legal entitlement over here and not seen as all that amazing.
Re:Ask HN: My boss doesn't think I'm doing good work, how to... by rogy on Friday January 07, 2022 @07:49AM (#29838501)
its also.. actually quite bad, I can't remember the last 'professional' job listing I saw that wasn't at least 25+holidays
Re:Ask HN: My boss doesn't think I'm doing good work, how to... by bluehatbrit on Friday January 07, 2022 @08:39AM (#29838944)
I agree, my last role was 25+ public holidays. They also offered holiday trading, which is a real "benefit" that should be advertised in my eyes. That allowed me to go up to 30 days annual leave + public holidays which was great. Current job is setup as unlimited with a minimum of 20 + public holidays, all in all I take about the same as I did at my last place but it's a bit less hassle to track.

Advertising 20 days + public holidays in the UK is basically advertising that you give people the minimum the law will let you.

Re:Ask HN: My boss doesn't think I'm doing good work, how to... by literallyWTF on Friday January 07, 2022 @01:00AM (#29835544)
Uh, or you have allotted hours that you can use and will use? My boss isn’t my mother, they don’t need to know the “real” reason why I’m calling in sick.
Re:Ask HN: My boss doesn't think I'm doing good work, how to... by DangitBobby on Friday January 07, 2022 @12:33AM (#29835368)
So far the companies I've worked at don't have "vacation" or "sick" days, they have "paid time off" (which is really great if you're healthy and really shitty if you're not).
Re:Ask HN: My boss doesn't think I'm doing good work, how to... by arka2147483647 on Friday January 07, 2022 @04:24AM (#29836980)
Atleast in Finland there is a clear, legal, distiction between vacation and sick days. They are not exchangeable in any way.
Re:Ask HN: My boss doesn't think I'm doing good work, how to... by rendall on Friday January 07, 2022 @05:34PM (#29845826)
Exactly. You can be out legitimately sick for 2 weeks, and then take a full vacation!

That's why it's such a breach of trust here to take a sick day in order to relax. A sick day is to recover from illness.