Re:Ask HN: How did you move on from past experiences?
by ethbr0 on Friday December 31, 2021 @02:34PM
(#29751665)
If you don't mind me asking, and it isn't too painful, what was the thought that initiated drinking?
I've always been curious, because while substance abuse hasn't been a feature of my life, I'm suspicious I have other outlets (that I'd like to recognize).
So what were the steps between (daily life stuff) and (I'm taking that first drink)? Resignation, sadness, boredom, lethargy, habit? Anything that I could watch out for in my own life? Any insight appreciated, and glad you feel healthier now.
Re:Ask HN: How did you move on from past experiences?
by bag_boy on Friday December 31, 2021 @09:49PM
(#29754987)
Thanks for saying that.
It’s hard to put my finger on which feelings initiated the drinking. I think that, subconsciously, I wanted to end my day comfortably numb.
This is how I got there:
“I have been drinking all week, why stop today?”
“Why stop at one beer? I can handle another”
I would watch out for repeated resignations. That seems to have created my bad habit.
I agree with your point about not harming yourself. After my first parent died, I tried to pretend like it never happened. I drank heavily to ignore the pain. Drinking affected my own physical and mental health. It was tough to break out of that cycle - it took about a year.
After my second parent died, I acknowledged the pain and tried to embrace the grief. I didn’t drink or take drugs - when a memory came to me, I just let it ride. That was a much healthier grieving experience.