Working with `useEffect()` is so fucking miserable. It’s a bit like owning a car where the gaps between the panels are just slightly too far apart; there’s always the possibility that some data is out of sync because React inexplicably decided to run a thing a tick later than you expected. “Effects” don’t actually mix with with the old class component methods, insofar as you’ll never be able to get an effect to run before component methods, so you end up having to gasp do side-effects in render against a bunch of “refs” to achieve some semblance of object permanence.

The implication behind the naming of “synchronous effects” as `useLayoutEffect()` is laughable, as though the only time you would ever want to run some code synchronously is for “layout” purposes. My guy, JavaScript’s security model is based on execution, you can’t copy to the clipboard, request full-screen/picture-in-picture, do countless privileged operations outside the synchronous execution of a native click handler, for instance, and we’re going to place all these use-cases under the umbrella term “layout?”

React applications are weird, shuddering messes, where callbacks fire senselessly based on “dependency arrays.” Heaven forfend you turn off linting which helps you not violate “the rules of hooks,” and even when it’s on there are countless gotchas about default parameters and callback functions which are recreated every render. At no point will you ever be able to correctly source the initiator of a “render,” because someone in their infinite wisdom decided to unroll the JavaScript call stack as a queue. Stepping out of a component in a debugger always places you in the same `while` loop and you’re left wondering where on Earth did this execution start. I don’t understand how programmers could be so ignorant of how useful a call stack is, and the React team essentially has to recreate call stacks in error messages and Devtools. Seasoned React developers have all seen “React minified error #185,” or “Maximum update depth exceeded.” This is essentially a stack overflow error, except of course they did away with the stack. It’s not normal for stack overflow errors to be happening as frequently as happens in React applications, and this is just when you’re lucky enough to get a warning; a lot of times the page will just hang and no one except your poor users will know.

I find it truly disturbing how professionals can make their and everyone’s lives so difficult, how deeply disconnected React is from the actual practice of programming, which is all about understanding how your code executes. My mind is boggled by 5 by 5 zoom calls of well-paid “staff engineers” chatting about React and writing tutorial upon tutorial like any of this normal. And these are the loud ones. I pray for the entry-level programmers, the contractors, the voiceless, who aren’t beefing on Twitter, who do not have a sense of how strange this kind of development is and don’t have the courage to speak up.