Perhaps it's where I live, but for me - it's just the internet. It doesn't have any resemblance to my reality. As someone who's been on the internet since a teen, watched it evolve, etc, it makes me kinda sad. Because I feel forced out. But that's ok.

As online communities, emboldened really by tech companies themselves, try to gain control by silencing dissent via mob behavior or 'canceling', I just find myself leaving. And in doing so make both myself and presumably the community happier for it. Take a walk in the park, or go sit on the beach a while. Make small talk with people walking by. In doing all this, I realize I never meet or see the type people who are so 'in control' and loud and/or threatening online. Most people seem friendly enough in person.

So my questions become - are these people even real? Do they live somewhere I'm just unfamiliar with? Or did the internet give them some loud voice that otherwise doesn't exist in person? Why are these voices the loudest - does controversy really sell this well? Is social media purposefully putting controversial things on the forefront because it increases engagement?

Not actually expecting answers, just rambling really - apologies.

Hi. I realize you're not looking for answers, but I would like to give my 2 cents. Now, this is just my opinion and I welcome constructive criticism.

> are these people even real? Do they live somewhere I'm just unfamiliar with? Or did the internet give them some loud voice that otherwise doesn't exist in person?

Yes. Most, but not all, of these "loud" influencers are real. Social media has become their platform to voice their opinions extremely loudly. And it has given them a reach that wasn't possible before. One public tweet on Twitter is instantly available to all the users and "lurkers". The algorithm pushes it based on engagement and it propagates through the filter bubble it "fits" in. Now they know that there are others who agree with them, but the only way to reach them is through social media. So most of them just keep their opinion online.

> Why are these voices the loudest - does controversy really sell this well? Is social media purposefully putting controversial things on the forefront because it increases engagement?

Yes. The main goal of Big Social (is that even a real term?) is to increase engagement and then sell ads. Fixing this "most engaged content goes to the top" approach will cut into their profits which will spook investors.

P.S This is my first comment outside of my own post (yes, only one post). I am a lurker

So this is my attitude - don’t mistake the discourse online by 1% of the population for how things actually work in the “real world”.

But then my company started encouraging you to put your “preferred pronouns” in your email signature.

Then suddenly it dawned on me those 1% reflect the beliefs of the leadership of my Fortune 100 company.

I also escape from the computer to reality like sports or walks. The people are real. Corporations like to install degenerate or mentally ill people in lower positions of power to humiliate the high performers and keep them under control.

The higher positions are still occupied by the jocks, who watch the whole theater with great amusement and joke about useful idiots (I have contact with a few of them).

No apologies needed. The internet gives people a platform to speak without the same(but not necessarily less) social accountability that exists in meatspace. The change in accountability implies a change in the access that participants have to social scripts. What we are experiencing is a mismatch of social script access between meatspace and the digital space enabled by novel digital mediums and increased connectivity.

That is the current contradiction. My bet is that neither the meatspace social construct nor the digital social construct wins. The resolution is in their synthesis. That probably means that some meatspace social norms change and some digital social norms change. Finally, any resistance to those changes in inherently reactionary.

> Or did the internet give them some loud voice that otherwise doesn't exist in person?

Yes, which then allowed them to become very much "real", both online and off.

These people always existed, it is just an uncomfortable change. It used to be holier than thou people at church now it’s holier than thou suburban teenagers on social media. It’s uncomfortable because many people did and still do think these people are liberal and “on their side” and don’t get that this toxic human behavior has existed forever and goes between groups.

The Atlantic's "The New Puritans [1] Mob Justice Is Trampling Democratic Discourse" is a good read (or listen) on the subject: https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2021/10/new-pur...

I grew up around fundamentalist religious folks and I am glad that someone else sees the parallel here. And it's hard, because besides the more sociopathic types that are 100% motivated by social status, there are many who really mean well and just don't understand how destructive dogmatic thinking is, and how it tends to mainly help bolster the aforementioned sociopaths in their goals of domination rather than any intended good effects in the world.

> I'm often forced to choose a side, even when it's all hypotheticals and virtues.

In what situations are you forced to choose a side? In conversations with your friends/family? At your place of employment (in whatever form that may be)?

Both, but maybe I've been skewed by my experience in Academia where sociopolitical issues are very sensitive these days.

Don’t. Think fearlessly and don’t lose the kernel of independent thought.

Social media might be doing you more harm than good? Offline surely isn’t like this for you too is it?

As the presentation notes, in some circles it is. I absolutely conduct myself in public under the presumption that people in the background could jump in at any moment to make a viral video. I don't necessarily want to defend that as a matter of risk assessment, I'm probably being too neurotic about it, but the idea that I might become the country's punching bag if I say the wrong thing is just deeply distressing.

I deleted my Facebook, stopped using Twitter, and even gave up projects on GitHub. I recently wrote a little rant about the death of my iPhone [1]... to be honest, I don't know how to live anymore. As much as I try to solve my problems, I find new ones in isolation. It's complicated and sad.

[1]: https://nixpulvis.com/ramblings/2021-09-30-death-to-an-iphon...