You just help them without saying you got $55M.

As the GP mentioned, people, even family members will start treating you differently (nicer if you start giving them your money, worse if you don't). That's IMO a valid excuse why you didn't want to tell.

> Wouldn't they think that you are a selfish doosh

I never cease to be amazed at how terrified people commonly are of trivial confrontation and worthless opinions.

A life spent placating other people to live by their low value opinions, will be a life very poorly lived. Rather than spending the effort on fretting about their low value opinions, that effort should go into mentally reducing the incorrect value being placed on said opinions.

People twist themselves into grotesque knots living under the unreasonable expectations of others, even living under the fantay projection opinions of those people (thoughts/opinions they don't even know to be the case, just things they fear may be the case), even when they quietly don't care about the person/s.

The sister in this story for example, she can go right fuck off. This guy wins $55m and is terrified of his own shadow, can't even deal with the sister (who he doesn't like at all, has zero interest in speaking to) he's afraid will demand that he donate half his wealth to her church. It's unbelievable behavior.

> I never cease to be amazed at how terrified people commonly are of trivial confrontation and worthless opinions.

So... you don't care if your family never talks to you again? I would.

If your family refused to speak to you because you didn't share your "wealth" with them, you would pay them off just so they would speak to you again?

Lying to your family and not telling them that you came into a ton of money would be the thing that could piss them off the most. It would seem like either you are being selfish and want it all to yourself or they will think that you think they are money grubbing moochers.

Also, yea, I could see not sharing some of that wealth with your family could come off as bad as well.

It's not about paying them off. If you love someone, you want to help them and make them happy. Not doing so seems selfish and the opposite of that.

Your position seems to be that:

1) If you have wealth, you are obligated to share your wealth with your extended family.

2) If you make a decision to not share your wealth with your extended family, they have a right to be mad at you.

This must be a cultural thing because I can't wrap my head around it. In my culture, money and family relationships are completely separate things. Our family connections are based on staying in touch with each other and spending time with the ones who are worth your time and attention. Money doesn't enter into the relationship at all. In fact, I'm reasonably certain that if I were to offer money anyone in my family, they would be deeply offended.

> If you love someone, you want to help them and make them happy.

This is a fallacy: money does not solve problems and it does not make anyone happy. You'll figure that out on your own eventually, though.

You have to have a fairly healthy family dynamic to be able to give or loan a lot of money to each other and not have everything ruined. And chances are that if you had that family dynamic already, you'd be less hesitant revealing your financial status.

What if their money issues are their own doing (they live way above their means)? If you give them money, you're an enabler.

Not sure why this is getting down voted. Most people who have money problems have them because of their own behaviors. I agree giving money to someone who is bad with money doesn't really help them it only wastes your money.

As long as you aren't giving them money to piss away on drugs or something similar, so what? You would give your family and/or friends an easier and happier life.

Maybe, but be careful. It doesn't have to be drugs. You can cover their food and some of their house payment, because they're broke, but they bought a new boat (or similar expensive item) anyways. Surely, they can't ask their rich relative for too many vacations, right? Or vacation houses?

For someone who keeps their word and is honest about their finances and asks for such-and-such, fine. For those who don't care for paying off the debt they have and always gets more, and you give them money, you're feeding their entitlement, and ultimately making no one happy.

What if they're not? It seems like the type of thing that requires individual judgement instead of a flat rule.