i hit my personal rock bottom at age 5. i never recovered

I flunked kindergarten. (It hurt even at that age.)

&LOL;

The early mastery of swearing I picked up between backseat driving (that is, listening to my Scottish mother's running commentary on other drivers) and my spongelike absorption of Canadian broadcast media, earned my parents a stern reproach from the ultra-bourgeois kindergarten they sent me off.

My oldest friend was held back in kindergarten. That’s how I met him.

Of course he's your oldest friend; being held back, he's a year older than all your others.

My kid is 3.5 and he still believes that 10 comes after 8. I'm deeply worried now.

Well, he's not wrong...

This is why you start your kids' acquaintance with computing in any OS but Windows.

He is just counting base 9. You need to catch up.

Einstein didn’t speak until age 4, so your kid is probably too precociously verbal to be the world’s most famous physicist.

Probably he had to think it through which first words were appropriate.

nah, just let him/her play

I'm hoping I'm a late bloomer from between the ages of 42 and 47.

Insufficiently expensive education.

With the right calculus teacher, I'm sure you'd have got the gist of it by your 60th month.