Contrary to what you might think, I agree with most (if not all) of what you're saying. They might decline to give me a reason to trust them, even after I've given them several opportunities. In that case, I have a strong signal to decline, and they have to do other things very well to compensate.

I'm not saying one should be picky, I'm just saying that if the worker and the employer have very different ideas of the value the worker brings, and one side is not open to discussing their perspective of things, my experience is that doesn't turn into a fruitful partnership with long-term prospects.

At best, it's a temporary gig and then the worker leaves with a bunch of knowledge. It's not a desirable position for anyone. (But that does happen, very often in larger companies, as you say.)