I'm well aware of how other people perceive it. It's completely contrary to the barrage of what I call "cult of the victim" that spews forth from nearly all media.
I don't expect to change your mind. But give it a chance. For example,
A man falls down the stairs and breaks his leg.
Victim: "I'm so unlucky, my leg broke. Oh, life is so unfair."
Non-Victim: "Phew, I'm so lucky! I could have broken my neck! My broken leg will heal and I'll be fine. Next time I won't leave my toys laying on the steps."
Walter: "I put carpet on the stairs so I wouldn't slip on them. I go jogging to (in part) increase bone density so they are less likely to break."
What life lessons do you want for the parent of a child who was sexually abused for example? Are they allowed to feel like a victim? What about the child?
[Villain music]
"‘He insulted me, hit me, beat me, robbed me’–for those who don’t brood on this, hostility is stilled.
"Hostilities aren’t stilled through hostility, regardless.
"Hostilities are stilled through non-hostility: this, an unending truth.
"Unlike those who don’t realize that we’re here on the verge of perishing, those who do: their quarrels are stilled."
--Dhammapada, ch. 1, circa 1st century common era (trans. Thanissaro Bhikkhu)
You’ve picked some arbitrary definition of what it means to be a victim based on god only knows what philosophy or life experience and then tried to state it as some kind of objective fact or enlightened wisdom.