This is the definition of victim-blaming.

You are going to lengths to imagine a way she is at fault.

If he didn't do anything illegal, then your suggestion that she poke his eyes or break his finger is entirely misplaced. You don't get to hurt people when they're not legally a threat to you.

Never mind how ridiculous a suggestion that is. Do you think maybe she made the rational decision not to risk her safety or even her life by escalating a fight she likely couldn't win?

That's blaming the victim. You can say you don't think she's at fault, but picking at her choices with no consideration of the situation she actually faced isn't "feeling for her."

You should talk to more women in your life about their experiences.

Every suggestion you're making here is premised on priors from your experience as a man that do not hold true for many or most women.

You say she should get out and call her dad or a friend. Yet your own reaction is one of questioning her experience and shaming her for "a long chain of bad decisions to end up drunk on your own wine, in a foreign country, in the apartment of a stranger you met on the internet." Do you imagine that a woman friend of yours reading your comment would trust that she should call you?

If you do any more flamewar like this on HN we will ban you. You violated the site guidelines very badly in this thread. No more of this please.

https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html

> these days they are equals

This is laughable and just reinforces what I'm saying: you need to listen to more of the women in your life about their actual experiences, not what you imagine them to be. I am not invoking my experience as a man. I am invoking the experiences of the vast majority of women I know. Their experiences are not even close to equal to mine, when it comes to their ease of moving about the world, not to mention their physical safety.

Any person, placed in a situation where they are in danger, can react in a way that isn't necessarily a matter of deciding in the first place. I was pointing out that even where there is a decision to made, it doesn't obviously favor fighting. But your confidence that a victim can fight back ignores what we know about rapes and the fight/flight/freeze stress response. Not reacting is entirely natural and very common, particularly when the situation isn't one that you've trained a habitual response to.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/grade-point/wp/2015/06/2...

Please don't perpetuate flamewars on HN. You also violated the guidelines, which ask:

"Don't feed egregious comments by replying; flag them instead."

If people would follow that simple rule, hellfires would die before they spread. Please don't contribute to spreading them by feeding them.

https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html