A few programs I would like to see:

  * an automatic 'why-is-the-system-down' excuse generator plugged into procmail
  * suid-root 'system cleaner' (kills all processes but the user's own bash shell)
  * an ld_library hook (fix_all_errors.c ?) to force exit() to always return true
  * a vi plugin for Emacs
  * a program that forces the admin to type the entire 100-bottles-of-beer song before
   - logging in as root
   - editing sudoers
   - implementing NIS or RSH
   - starting any process with a listening tcp/udp socket as root