The funny thing is that there are both:
- communities of men who think women are shallow (they spend all their time on instagram, they only care about their looks and about how wealthy and good looking their partner is);
- communities of women who think men are shallow (they only want to fuck, they don't care about you at all, they spend more time on their cars than on their girlfriends).
Both communities are wrong.
There's a certain survivorship bias there: such men don't get removed from the market. Men genuinely seeking long term commitments, or even medium term ones, will often find them and leave.
Some women do do. That was the one and only point of my comment: to show that there are both men and women who fall prey to the exact same inductive fallacy.
But you're right not all of them is, but the majority I have meet country wide are from all the professions one can think of and all the life backgrounds you can imagine.
Because most of them are ignoring nice guys, at least while the women are in their 20-s. The book "Land of the Losers" nailed it.
Not to say that they necessarily are, and to be fair, almost all dating app advice I’ve seen comes down to building a copy/paste format. I’ve seen a a few apps that seem entirely populated by people a certain “archetype” in my area.
Add in the moral panic surrounding consent and sex, and you get a chilling effect on courtship and socializing.
What incentive do men have to interact with women, when the social climate makes it a tight-rope walk where even the slightest false impression of impropriety will forever destroy your reputation?
Especially when you can get off to porn? Sorry, it's obvious why things are the way they are and only politically invested types would care to argue otherwise.
But I don't feel anger towards women or feel upset about it, rather I devote my life to the things I enjoy doing.