>What's the point of an unstable, volatile, frantically manipulated currency that is susceptible to social media pump and dump schemes (Elon + Doge)?

BTC is only volatile as not enough people use it. Further, if you stay on USD, every year a cappuccino will cost you more. Fractional reserve banking is practically a license to print USD. We're not funding the stimulus or really any of our government via tax anymore. Inflation is the real tax.