> I prefer functional programming, and have a background in functional programming, but I still primarily work with Java... In my opinion, Java as a language is gross and unlovable, but the runtime, the development tooling, and selection of libraries and other integrations is about as good as it gets.

It sounds like Clojure is perfect for you then. You have all the upsides of Java you mention here with Clojure because it's hosted on the JVM (among other platforms). You can use Java libraries and SDKs seamlessly from Clojure, but the language itself was designed specifically for a functional style from the beginning.