I'm a day late to this immense comment chain, but my point is that Bell's Theorem specifically rules out local hidden variables unless scientists are forced to choose never to conduct an experiment that will expose those local hidden variables.

I'm not talking about determinism, I'm talking about Superdeterminism, which is akin to saying that coins will always land heads-up because people are compelled to avoid flipping coins in situations where it will land on tails. Please see my link.