> Honestly, I don't think most men are wired for doing this role... I was socially isolated, had no support (all support structures were mother orientated)

Maybe it's the social structures that aren't wired for men to do it, rather than the biological ones. What made you feel like the difference was biological rather than due to external society?

Two reasons. The first is that women tend to just like babies. Female friends want to hold a baby but male friends almost never do. Women get "clucky" around them, etc.

The second is that when my youngest was 6 months old I felt nothing for him. I saw a psychologist about this and they said it was really normal for dads to not feel connected to second+ kids until the kids are past a year.

Biologically, I think that there are always going to be more single mothers than single fathers. Women can get pregnant without knowing who the father is. Although formula exists today, men could not feed young babies very well for most of history. These social structures are probably intended to serve a greater number of people, so they serve women better than men.

It is mentally difficult for mothers too. Like isolation, there is reason why the stereotype of woman used to be constantly on the phone. Or taking a lot after husband came from work.

Single parenthood is even harder, it sounds that you have done good job with them.

Sorry, I didn't mean to imply it's not hard on mother's too. I meant that they seem to have a better hormonal reward system with babies. Mother's seem really happy cuddling their little ones and adult women tend to enjoy cuddling babies compare to adult men. I didn't have that same connection with mine so I didn't get reward, at the time, for my efforts.

I did not meant to imply that you implied, you did not.

Just that the a lot of those frustrating and isolating aspects are not that you are less made or less capable for it, it is shared frustration and depression. Tho, advantage of being mom is that you can find other mom to complain to. I agree it is harder for men who are less likely to be in that position.

Hormonal things are more after birth. Moms can also get "touched out" when you don't want touch anymore. Some of cuddling is really done because you know it is good for kids.

I don't want to be the one who will say your experience of being uncomfortable more does not exists. It is way more ok for women to touch other women them males touching other males. These aspects are much different between genders.

Imo, a lot of women specific socialization is really about teaching women how to break isolation etc. It is the thing I realized only after I had kids. A lot of stereotypes were actually adaptation.