You have social security, medicare, state and federal income tax.
You should take into account that some parts of the US are more expensive than others, and that state income tax is not the same for every state. Also, 401k (pension plans) and some other types of savings, investments are deductible from the taxes.
It all depends on who you live with, do you have children, etc.
Relatively few personal purchases are deductible. The most heavily used personal deduction is mortgage interest (interest, not principal). Otherwise most personal deductions are things like tuition, major healthcare expenses, tax paid elsewhere (sales, property), and alimony payments.
And for a majority of Americans, none of these things actually appear on their tax return. Only 41% of American taxpayers file a return listing the deductions above ("itemize"), usually because they carry a mortgage.
The other 59% just take a single deduction ("standard deduction") of about $5800 per adult (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Standard_deduction).
Finally, if someone found legitimate ways to deduct the things you listed (for example, they were unreimbursed business expenses), they would run into the Alternative Minimum Tax (AMT). AMT is a floor on the percent of income which must be paid as tax. In calculating AMT, most deductions get ignored (and it ignores one's effective tax rate in other years).
The American Opportunity/Hope and Lifetime Learning Credits can be applied when using the standard deduction. Also, many cars have significant tax credits though it seems the bar has been raised.
100k US$ bruto is equivalent to a bruto pay (100k * 0.7 euros/dollar / 1.20 (increased costs) = 60k euro (equivalent cost for employer).
In the US, that 100k employee can spend 66000 dollars. In the EU an employee can spend, on that exact same salary the equivalent of 32000 dollars (VAT deducted so as to reflect that most US doesn't have any significant VAT or sales tax).
Yes medical stuff is mostly free, and retirement benefits are included. But you're paying > 50% tax (some of it's hidden : your employer pays directly and it doesn't count to bruto wages, but obviously it still counts on the balance sheet)
And this is ignoring VAT, which is another 20% on any amount of money you actually spend.
Oh, and, at least where I'm from, nobody's happy with their retirement benefits. It's about 80% from your average wage during your career. The killer is, of course, in inflation. Suppose you ended your career at 4000 net, after 45 years of working, at an average inflation rate of 4%. How much retirement do you get for those 60% taxes you paid ?
1532 euros/month
The best deal is simple : work in the US, retain EU citizenship and have a US private sector pension (or, say, a Swiss or Australian one, but it must be outside of the EU) + minimum pension in the EU (minimum pension is about 750 euros/month). If you own a house, of course, that 750 euros is quite comfortable. If you don't, it's basically impossible to survive on it.
So what you can do with 45k year? Well this is 3750 euro per month, it's enough to pay for a decent house, to pay your bills, to go for vacation a few times per year. If you have sons better your wife to work as well, otherwise life it is still feasible but with restrictions.
What you can do with $100k in US and how much of this are spent in taxes?
Edit: btw a difference is that in UE you don't have to think too much about putting money in the bank in order to retire, the government will provide you with a post-work salary that is proportional to your past income (at least this is how it works in Italy, France, Germany, ...). Also medical stuff are mostly free.