Classic "virtual surround" works like you've noticed in VLC. I believe the new spatial audio formats (including Apple's) all use a standard HRTF (head-related transfer function) that approximates an average person's ear canal shape. This lets you be placed in a virtual space surrounded by audio sources/objects.

Sony's Mark Cerny had a fascinating talk on PS5's spatial audio implementation. Sony might even support importing a custom-measured HRTF for even greater sound placement accuracy. No idea where you'd get it measured though!