The pole owner controls what is attached.. There may be pole attachment agreements you can review, but depending on the distance and complexity of the route and how many poles may need upgrades the costs still sound a bit high, but maybe they're all much taller poles. A pole itself costs $800 to start for a 32' delivered, but you need someone with a truck crane, which also requires a crane license to set it. Figure a few people at $25-35/hr as well to prep and repair the ground and you can see why it's a big cost.

I'm a fan of one touch make ready rules, but when you get to rural areas many of the poles are old, and to get the 18' clearance on a road span requires moving everyone else up, which may mean a new pole.