The biggest thing you seem to be missing is that none of your arguments are unique to fighting AI. You still only get one chance against a human pilot. You don't know how good they are individually, you don't know if they have any special tricks, and you don't know whether they've got all the available upgrades on their jet, or if they have some old or broken equipment. You do know the average skill level of the enemy pilots, and what equipment they might have, so you make your decisions by assuming that they are a competent pilot with the best equipment that is likely to be on that jet. Warfare still happens even when you don't have time to gather up perfect information and make a perfect decision.

One other thing to note is that there will not be a unique AI in every individual jet; that would be impossible to maintain. There will be one version rolled out to each type of jet, maybe with a few customization options that can be changed during mission planning. When a new AI version comes out of testing it will get rolled out to every plane in the fleet that has the required computing power- some jets used for training/reserve/national guard duties won't have the latest hardware upgrades and won't get the newest version. So a pilot will be able to ID a jet, know where it is generally strong and weak, and then try to target the enemy's weakness while avoiding the strengths. Sometimes they'll lose, but once enough people have survived encounters with AI jets (either from exploiting stolen jets or from plain old combat) the best practices will get pushed to the other squadrons. Just like what already happens.