Re:Ask HN: Is There a Manual for Babies?
by austincheney on Tuesday July 21, 2020 @02:08AM
(#23904670)
The best manual is a proper set of expectations... readjust your reality accordingly:
* Plan on getting about 4 hours of sleep per night at first. Sleep where you can find it and avoid stimulants.
* Your female delivery counterpart (I don't know your relationship status) will suddenly realize this is her new life: locked between a child, obligations, and without a swimsuit model body. Depression and self-doubt will follow. You have to be a team player even without sufficient sleep.
* Infants require a lot of time constantly and are tiring. Think of this as having a full time job that pays money with great reassurance and respect. Then you come home to another job that costs money, is extremely tiring, and is filled with risk.
* Getting refridgerated breast milk the right temperature at feeding time is far more time consuming and challenging than you could possibly imagine.
* Your 2 door sports car is now a hinderence. Trade it in for anything with 4 doors and excellent suspension.
* Your 1 bedroom apartment won't work. If you already have a child your two bedroom apartment is a struggle.
* If you are an extrovert your days of late night social activies and parties are over. First of all you will be too tired for any of that nonsense. Secondly, it becomes such a low priority its simply not worth the effort.
* Prepare to enjoy life as a secluded homebody. Going out to movies and fancy dinners is a nightmare.
* Hopefully you have been saving money. Everything in life just become more expensive, except car insurance.
* Get a cat. Cat fur greatly contributes to dust and all the problems that with that which is great for strengthening the immune response of small children.
* Family will give you gifts. Figuring out where to put all that stuff can be a real challenge.
---
There are a lot of benefits too:
* Children are great for self-reflecting upon your time management and money management skills.
* Children are a solid performance gauge of whether you are a narcissist or are humble.
* Having children completely recenters your perception of the world in a way you cannot understand otherwise.
* Plan on getting about 4 hours of sleep per night at first. Sleep where you can find it and avoid stimulants.
* Your female delivery counterpart (I don't know your relationship status) will suddenly realize this is her new life: locked between a child, obligations, and without a swimsuit model body. Depression and self-doubt will follow. You have to be a team player even without sufficient sleep.
* Infants require a lot of time constantly and are tiring. Think of this as having a full time job that pays money with great reassurance and respect. Then you come home to another job that costs money, is extremely tiring, and is filled with risk.
* Getting refridgerated breast milk the right temperature at feeding time is far more time consuming and challenging than you could possibly imagine.
* Your 2 door sports car is now a hinderence. Trade it in for anything with 4 doors and excellent suspension.
* Your 1 bedroom apartment won't work. If you already have a child your two bedroom apartment is a struggle.
* If you are an extrovert your days of late night social activies and parties are over. First of all you will be too tired for any of that nonsense. Secondly, it becomes such a low priority its simply not worth the effort.
* Prepare to enjoy life as a secluded homebody. Going out to movies and fancy dinners is a nightmare.
* Hopefully you have been saving money. Everything in life just become more expensive, except car insurance.
* Get a cat. Cat fur greatly contributes to dust and all the problems that with that which is great for strengthening the immune response of small children.
* Family will give you gifts. Figuring out where to put all that stuff can be a real challenge.
---
There are a lot of benefits too:
* Children are great for self-reflecting upon your time management and money management skills.
* Children are a solid performance gauge of whether you are a narcissist or are humble.
* Having children completely recenters your perception of the world in a way you cannot understand otherwise.