About to say the same thing! I'm sure there are some people who use a mechnical keyboard to "show off", but for me (and I assume the vast majority) the noise you endure is pollution while I enjoy the tactile & audio dopamine hit.

car engine noise model: get an app that plays clicky sounds and headphones?

Emacs got selectric mode :)

I use Greens, which are even louder, but nothing compares to the volume of the buckling spring "PING" noise

clackity clackity clackity

This has been the biggest complaint from my wife since the "work from home" started.