Free upgrade sounds fine - when were these offered, and how would a person take advantage? I have one of the aforementioned permanent accounts (on jervis, even) and if migrating to a new server means that my site is less likely to fall over, I certainly would do it. However, I just dug through all the emails I ever received from Joyent or Textdrive, and none of them mentioned migrating to another server for free. Lots of stuff about how I could pay more to have more, but since things are basically fine for me (running http://imprompt.us and http://tracyfood.com both of which are low-bandwidth vanilla wordpress sites), I ignored all of that.

tl;dr: how can I go about moving my stuff? To where? And why am I in this handbasket?