I've always been a huge fan of the Graphile (aka postgraphile) approach. It's just an open-source library, that you can run as a binary when you're just getting started. But when you start getting deep in production territory, it's extensively pluggable and you can gradually swap everything out for your own code, contribute/fork if you need (it's just TS), etc. Full control.

I love the Hasura folks too, and they're a funded startup rather than a one-person operation relying on donations. Open source is hard, and benjie (creator of graphile and many other things, he's incredible) could use some help: https://www.patreon.com/benjie