I am very reluctant to do that. I am not a therapist, but I know enough to know there's some danger in applying labels to people in this sort of situation willy-nilly. commandersaki was less reluctant, and they did pick up on one of the things I heard, so I guess I'll at least endorse that post from that perspective.

I would actually recommend taking your post as-is to a therapist as a starting session. (I wouldn't bother with the HN conversation itself.) It's a good starting point.

I'd say this... going to see a therapist once is not itself a commitment. If after the first time you don't feel like it's going to help, you will be free to stop. But I do believe there is some significant and true help that you can get from one... even if I am very reluctant to put into words the reasons why I believe that. I apologize for that, but I am trying my best to be helpful, and to not hurt you unnecessarily or out of unprofessional clumsiness.