It sounds like a more established company might be a better landing place. Established companies are probably more likely to accept the risks associated with relocating someone in their forties and have more experience with doing so. Those companies also are less likely to go under and large companies offer more opportunities to meet people.

In the end, if you want to move to California, decide to move to California. Make the tradeoffs. Figure out the details. Work through the problems. If it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out.