Thanks for sharing this context--just a small response on polygamy...

> As an ex-mormon, we were taught deeply all about Joseph, and that he was not a polygamist that started w/ Brigham

Polygamy is taught in the Doctrine and Covenants, which almost every Mormon will carry to church on Sunday..

https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/scriptures/dc-test...

> Revelation given through Joseph Smith the Prophet ... including the eternity of the marriage covenant and the principle of plural marriage.