During bad times it’s awful, during good times it’s “only a matter of time”.

I wish I knew how I could avoid feeling so helpless. So far I have tried “pretending to not care what happens to me and my career” and “fantasizing unrealistically about freelancing”

Try to leave at a time of your choosing. Try to set some parameters or goals for how/when to do that, such as paying down debt, having a savings cushion or lining up another job.

Control some piece of it to some degree.

Also, I’d tell anyone in a tough work environment to ensure they're keeping their mental and physical health up. I needed PT from all the muscle strains the one place gave me, for instance.

I also drank roasted cacao daily for a good theobromine and caffeine kick! It really did help me feel like “it’ll all be ok” during the worst of it.