I generally shoot for genuine respect of people. I far prefer the company of authentic but socially awkward people to superficially smooth con artist types.

If one can combine authentic respect with smooth language, they are basically hitting international diplomat levels of social interaction. Awesome if one can pull that off, but quite oppressive to expect it as a default for being able to interact with others at all.

Which is why PC culture is very often toxic: In a world where asking for both is very often asking too much, it usually prioritizes style over substance.

You will note that HN doesn't require PC language. The mods will not come down on you for casually swearing. They will come down on you for ad hominems.

It's a good standard, imo.