Re:Older Americans are alone half their waking hours, on ave...
by asark on Friday July 12, 2019 @06:21PM
(#20425042)
I've found it a hell of a lot harder to actually enjoy time with my kids since we went past one. It's frustrating because I'm not getting alone-time or doing exactly what I want to, as one without any kids might, but I'm also not getting to deeply, mindfully enjoy a very high percentage of time spent with my kids, as I could so easily when we just had one. All it took then was an occasional gentle reminder to myself to stay present. Now... man, it'd take some next-level Zen shit to achieve that with three kids on any kind of regular basis. Even two was a pretty big hit to that kind of quality time. It's achievable with some planning and luck now, basically, when it was just natural and almost constant before.
For me, I think that frustration's the source of my "oh god just drop me on a deserted island with some books and leave me" fantasies. I'd rather be around my kids and enjoying high-quality parent-kid time because it actually is pretty great, but that's so rarely and unpredictably available that the loner route becomes more appealing.
That was my first thought, as well - I have a wife and two teenaged kids, and they drain absolutely all of my free time. I keep reminding myself that I should be taking advantage and enjoying this time that I have to spend with them because in a few years, they’ll be away and I won’t see them very often, but I do feel like I would like just an hour here and there to pick what channel to watch and not have to debate about it. I wonder if I’ll feel differently when I finally get to that point, though - I am sure that I’m going to miss my kids when they move away, because I already miss having little kids running around the house (even though they sort of drove me crazy at the time then, too).