>I'm pissed off that it's families and cyclists that somehow bear the enormous responsibility for improving driver behavior and justifying road infrastructure

It shouldn't be this way, and I agree with you that the burden should be on car drivers.

However, I don't think it will be enough of a consolation for most of the parents in a situation where their kid on a bicycle got injured or, worse, killed. Not many parents would be willing to accept the trade-off of potentially sacrificing health or life of their child in the name of a greater good. And I am saying that as someone who doesn't even have children or ever plans to have any for rather selfish reasons. I can easily imagine that people who actually have children probably have way stronger feelings on this than me.