> I want to automatically refund every chargeback attempt without it affecting my ability to charge credit cards.

That is just not how chargebacks work, sorry. I do think there is merrit to urge issuers and card brands to change the chargeback behaviour or rules, i.e. to always give the merchant the opportunity to refund first. Essentially to make the retrievals or inquiries flow mandatory for all disputes. There you are given the opportunity to refund and respond before escalation.

Stripe and others cannot do much here except for lobbying.