Interesting. I'm the same way in the first regard. 27 y/o for reference. I always wished my parents had pushed a bit harder, but now I live in Irvine (SoCal) where everyone here is busy trying to push their children to prodigy-dom. I get an intense window into this because my partner is a private piano teacher and I have to say, I'm quite thankful they never pushed me like _that_. There's definitely a middle road and as a parent of two, I can empathize with this being somewhat difficult to nail.

I spent a lot of time feeling like you, wanting more but not executing. That said, I have been pretty successful in the last two years, learning those things on my own. I learned/am learning how to be a very proficient dev, play classical guitar, snowboard, dive, and surf decently, and even now fly planes. I'm not the best but enough for some serious personal enjoyment. For me it was the catalyst of flipping my world upside down, moving far away and starting over. Drop me a line if you ever want, maybe I can offer some assistance.